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Bad Name Category:

The "How About Another Last Name?"

 

The idea of people having more than one name originated with the ancient Romans, who had three names: a clan name, a personal name, and a family name. After the fall of Rome, most of Europe used only one name, as most communities were so small that one name was enough. But by the eleventh century A.D., surnames were beginning to take hold again, derived from occupations (Smith, Cartwright), physical appearance (Brown, Short), relatives (Jones, Williams), the terrain of one's property (Hill, Lake), or city of origin (Lincoln, York).

The people of medieval ages saw no reason to confuse each other by using more than one last name. Names such as "Taylor Brown" would be an absurdity. This would merely provide two labels by which to identify a person. It would be akin to addressing one's attorney as "That Lawyer Guy."

One of the more popular fads in baby-naming is to use an English surname as a child's first name. This is a colossal mistake. Surnames are designed to provide descriptions to elaborate on one's first name. With no first name to elaborate on, they sputter and fall limp. Besides, their meanings, clear to anyone with half a brain, are no longer apt descriptions. How many boys named "Taylor" grow up to be tailors? And how many boys named "Austin" even know who St. Augustine of Canterbury is, much less live near his shrine?

A second problem caused by extra last names is the "last name, first name, middle initial" forms so beloved by anyone who has ever filled out an application of any sort. Seeing a name like "Hunter, Taylor" appear in a database leaves those who access it uncertain of whether the person's name is "Taylor Hunter" or "Hunter Taylor". This goes double for people whose last names are also first names, e.g. "Alexander". Anyone who sees "Alexander, Taylor" is almost certain to quote the name as "Alexander Taylor", leaving poor Taylor to waste his time correcting this mistake.

 

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