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Dear Delriece...
When I first decided to become a wiccan, my marriage was in trouble
from other sources and I knew I would be leaving my husband, who is a
fundamentalist Christian, so I didn't tell him. While we were separated,
he stayed on good terms with my parents, also fundamentalist Christians.
Now we are back together. At first, in case things didn't work out, I
was afraid to tell my husband about my religious conversion, figuring
if I had to leave him again he would tell my parents. Since things are
working out, and since he keeps talking about going back to church, I
want to tell him that I am a wiccan. Unfortunately, the fact that I
waited so long is making it harder, and I have seen how he is reacting to
one of his brothers buying books about witchcraft. Should I tell him?
How should I tell him?
Amy in Charleston SC
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Dear Amy,
Well, you certainly have made it more difficult! But, unless you are afraid that he may become violent, it is a good idea for you to tell him since you need trust in your relationship. I suggest that you set aside some time to talk with him and be prepared with definitions and further information. Tell him that you need to share something with him that is a very special to you. Tell him that you are Wiccan and remind him that you are still the same person that he respects and loves and that he knows that you would stop doing something if it were harmful to you. If he reacts negatively then wait until he is finished venting and stay calm. If he says things you know to be untrue about Wicca, simply ask, "Would you like to hear what I believe about that?" Don't force information on him, don't get defensive, and let him ask the questions if possible.
Light!
Delriece
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