"The Eagle Cries"
Use this stationary for your daily emails!
http://thundercloud.net/sept11/eagle-cries.htm
Latest news reports advise that a cell of 4 terrorists have been operating in the Baucomville area. Police advised earlier today that 3 of the 4 have been detained.
The Detective stated that the terrorists Bin Stealin, Bin Drinkin and Bin Rappin have been arrested on immigration issues.
The Police advise further that they can find no one fitting the description of the fourth cell member, Bin Workin, in the area. Police are confident that anyone who looks like he's Bin Workin will be very easy to spot in that community.
Stay tuned for further developments.
Just incase their are any doubts - this is a joke!!!
Be careful!
Don't go to the bathroom on October 28th. CIA intelligence reports that a major plot is planned for that day. Anyone who takes a poop on the 28th will be bitten on the ass by an alligator or crocodile. Reports indicate that organized groups of terrorist-trained alligators in Florida and crocodiles elsewhere are planning to rise up into unsuspecting American's toilet bowls and bite them when they are doing their dirty business.
I usually don't send emails like this, but I got this information from a reliable source. It came from a friend of a friend whose cousin is dating this girl whose brother knows this guy whose wife knows this lady whose husband buys hotdogs from this guy who knows a shoeshine guy who shines the shoes of a mailroom worker who has a friend who's drug dealer sells drugs to another mailroom worker who works in the CIA building. He apparently overheard two guys talking in the bathroom there about Internet hoaxes and how they are all a crock of shit. Obviously, this is terrorist code-talk for sneaky crocodile toilet attacks in the rear. So it must be true.
While growing up in Zambia in the 1970s, I learned that it was generally safer to kick a lion in a game park than to criticize the president in public. Nothing but praise was heaped on then-President Kenneth Kaunda, a man of such integrity that he refused to be a dictator, insisting instead on regular elections in which he would run -- with amazing success -- against himself.
The suspense on election night was incredible. Would Kaunda win again? Or would he lose to Kaunda? It was always too close to call.
Despite the sham democracy, people were reluctant to complain. They didn't want their names transferred from the voters list to the missing persons list.
The political climate has improved considerably in the Central African nation, but I'd be surprised if Zambians can speak their minds as freely as Americans. Few countries can match the freedom of speech in America, where making fun of the president isn't just permitted, it's highly recommended. A virtual sport.
If there's one thing Americans are always eager to share with each other, it's a Clinton or Bush joke. Even children have fun with presidential jokes: "Why did President Bush panic when he spotted several ants walking across his desk? Because he had heard about the ant tracks scare."
As a writer and humorist, I cherish freedom of speech. It allows me to express my views freely without worrying that I might get in trouble with the government or, even worse, with my wife. Freedom of speech is one of America's greatest virtues, but it's not quite as unfettered as I once thought. In the aftermath of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, at least a handful of Americans have been chastised for expressing dissenting views. If you can't bleed red, white and blue, they've been told, go bleed somewhere else.
Seven television stations dropped the late night talk show "Politically Incorrect" after host Bill Maher decided to be a little too politically incorrect. The comedian called past U.S. missile attacks "cowardly," a comment that some viewers found politically insulting.
Maher later apologized, but to regain those seven stations, he may have to change the name of his show to "Politically Innocuous."
At least Maher kept his job. Columnists at two daily newspapers were fired for criticizing Bush's handling of the terrorist attacks. The publisher of one of the papers tried to appease readers by writing an opinion piece titled, "Bush's leadership has been superb." Ah, American journalism at its finest.
On Sept. 10, Bush was fair game for ridicule; on Sept. 11, he was Saint George the exalted one. Ready to slay Osama the dragon.
Even colleges, traditionally a wellspring of debate, have clamped down on errant voices. A library assistant at the University of California at Los Angeles earned a five-day suspension without pay for sending an email on a university computer criticizing America's support of Israel. He had apparently forgotten to read the rules, which clearly state that university computers are to be used for pro-Israel purposes only.
A University of New Mexico professor received threats after saying, on Sept. 11, "Anyone who can blow up the Pentagon has my vote." He has since apologized for being a "jerk," noting that the U.S. Constitution's guarantee of free speech protects his "right to be a jerk." He didn't lose his job, probably because he's a tenured jerk.
Of course, the First Amendment to the Constitution forbids only
government interference in a person's right to free speech. Employers
and others can apparently interfere all they want.
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(c) Copyright 2001 Melvin Durai. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.melvindurai.com
Melvin Durai is an Indiana-based writer, humorist and occasional stand-up comedian. A native of India, he grew up in Zambia and moved to the U.S. in the early 1980s. Through the Internet, his column is read by thousands of people in more than 75 countries.
On the news, they are saying that the firemen are getting discouraged. They leave out the part about the horrific conditions and sights they see, but through it all, they go on and on and on and on...
So here is an idea: A Card-Writing Campaign. Go out to your local Hallmark (or where ever it is you by your greeting cards) and buy a card that reflects what your feelings are about their heroic efforts and send it to them to:
NYC Fire Department
1 Chase Manhattan Plaza
New York, NY 10005
Just think how powerful this message can be.
Lets start our own miracle. Lets show these brave men how we feel about them. They need our love, support and encouragement.
Once when I was a teenager, my father and I were standing in line to buy tickets for the circus. Finally, there was only one family between us and the ticket counter. This family made a big impression on me. There were eight children, all probably under the age of 12. You could tell they didn't have a lot of money. Their clothes were not expensive, but they were clean. The children were well-behaved, all of them standing in line, two-by-two behind their parents, holding hands. They were excitedly jabbering about the clowns, elephants and other acts they would see that night. One could sense they had never been to the circus before. It promised to be a highlight of their young lives.
The father and mother were at the head of the pack standing proud as could be. The mother was holding her husband's hand, looking up at him as if to say, "You're my knight in shining armor." He was smiling and basking in pride, looking at her as if to reply, "You got that right."
The ticket lady asked the father how many tickets he wanted. He proudly responded, "Please let me buy eight children's tickets and two adult tickets so I can take my family to the circus."
The ticket lady quoted the price.
The man's wife let go of his hand, her head dropped, the man's lip began to quiver. The father leaned a little closer and asked, "How much did you say?"
The ticket lady again quoted the price.
The man didn't have enough money.
How was he supposed to turn and tell his eight kids that he didn't have enough money to take them to the circus?
Seeing what was going on, my dad put his hand into his pocket, pulled out a $20 bill and dropped it on the ground. (We were not wealthy in any sense of the word!) My father reached down, picked up the bill, tapped the man on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, sir, this fell out of your pocket."
The man knew what was going on. He wasn't begging for a handout but certainly appreciated the help in a desperate, heartbreaking, embarrassing situation. He looked straight into my dad's eyes, took my dad's hand in both of his, squeezed tightly onto the $20 bill, and with his lip quivering and a tear streaming down his cheek, he replied, "Thank you, thank you, sir. This really means a lot to me and my family."
My father and I went back to our car and drove home. We didn't go to the circus that night, but we didn't go without.
Reprinted by permission of Dan Clark © 1994, from A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen. All rights reserved.
Some speculate that protesters in Bangladesh lifted this image of bin Laden and the Muppet character Bert, who has been graphically enhanced, from an Internet parody site.
NEW YORK (CNN) -- The producers of the popular children's program "Sesame Street" said Thursday they are upset because protesters in Bangladesh are carrying protest posters showing the Muppet character Bert with Osama bin Laden.
The pictures showed up in posters carried by anti-American demonstrators during violent protests in Bangladesh this week.
The posters show a variety of images of
appeared around 1996 on the site http://www.spacecat.com/bert/ . The site has amassed a collection of doctored photos that depict the children's character as an evil madman working alongside villains like Hitler and grand dragons of the KKK.
But the originator of "Bert is Evil" says on his main Web page -- http://www.fractalcow.com/index2.html -- that he had nothing to do with the Bert and bin Laden image. He points to another Web page -- www.j-roen.net/bert/how/how.phtml -- where he says the image originated, but that page now shows only a message saying the image has been removed.
It appears that the photo in question, in which an angry Bert can be seen alongside bin Laden, was lifted from the Internet by the creators of the protest posters in Bangladesh.
It is not clear whether the protesters actually knew who the character Bert is, and what he means to U.S. children.
The posters show a variety of images of bin Laden; but over the left shoulder of the largest image of the accused terrorist is a smaller image of Bert beside a smaller image of bin Laden.
"Sesame Street has always stood for mutual respect and understanding. We're outraged that our characters would be used in this unfortunate and distasteful manner. This is not humorous," Sesame Workshop producers said. "The people responsible for this should be ashamed of themselves. We are exploring all legal options to stop this abuse and any similar abuses in the future."
The image is similar to those on a Web parody site "Bert is Evil," which first appeared around 1996 on the site www.spacecat.com/bert/. The site has amassed a collection of doctored photos that depict the children's character as an evil madman working alongside villains like Hitler and grand dragons of the KKK.
But the originator of "Bert is Evil" says on his main Web page -- www.fractalcow.com/index2.html -- that he had nothing to do with the Bert and bin Laden image. He points to another Web page -- www.j-roen.net/bert/how/how.phtml -- where he says the image originated, but that page now shows only a message saying the image has been removed.
It appears that the photo in question, in which an angry Bert can be seen alongside bin Laden, was lifted from the Internet by the creators of the protest posters in Bangladesh.
It is not clear whether the protesters actually knew who the character Bert is, and what he means to U.S. children.
Perhaps this is how we should treat terrorism today like General "BlackJack" Perishing did in the Philippines. Read on.........
"In the years preceding World War I, General Pershing was commander of the American forces in the Philippines. The small Moslem community on the island nation began to wreak havoc against the Philippine government and American forces. The American troops captured a large group of these terrorists. During the interrogation by the Military Court, the fanatics were heard to repeatedly shout, 'Allah Achbar! Allah Achbar! Jihad! The Philippines are the lands of Islam!'
"Pershing ordered the Amalekites executed one by one in the presence of the whole group. (The author is referring to the prophecy in the Bible that the Amalekites would be a very vicious and war?like people down through history.) Moslems will not eat pork believing that no one could enter Paradise if there is even the smallest amount of swine flesh in their bodies. Knowing this, the General first ordered the firing squad to shoot large hogs. After they skinned the swine, the executioners rolled their bullets in pork fat and passed fat through the barrels of their rifles while the condemned watched. As each condemned terrorist was executed, his corpse was wrapped in hog's skin and buried on the spot. The entrails of the swine were dumped over the corpse before the grave was covered. Three of the convicted Amalekites were released to take the news back to their Islamic Communities. That ended the Islamic Jihad in the Philippines. Terrorist incidents from Islamic Fundamentalists were unheard of until a decade ago when the U.S. State Department recognized the PLO as legitimate 'Freedom Fighters' "
(Vendyl Jones, RESEARCHER [Arlington, Texas: Vendyl Jones Research Institutes, January 2001]: 20).
Broken Arrow, Oklahoma School officials
remove "God Bless America" signs from schools
in fear that someone might be offended.
Channel 12 News in Long Island, New York,
orders flags removed from the newsroom
and red, white, and blue ribbons removed
from the lapels of reporters.
Why?
Management did not want to appear biased
and felt that our nations flag might
give the appearance that "they lean
one way or another".
Berkeley, California bans U.S. Flags
from being displayed on city fire
trucks because they didn't want
to offend anyone in the community.
In an "act of tolerance" the head of
the public library at Florida Gulf
Coast University ordered all
"Proud to be an American" signs
removed so as to not offend
international students.
I, for one, am quite disturbed by
these actions of so-called American
citizens; and I am tired of this nation
worrying about whether or not we are
offending some individual or their culture.
Since the terrorist attacks on
September 11, we have experienced
a surge in patriotism by the majority
of Americans. However, the dust
from the attacks had barely settled
in New York and Washington D.C.
when the "politically correct" crowd
began complaining about the possibility
that our patriotism was offending others.
I am not against immigration,
nor do I hold a grudge against
anyone who is seeking a better
life by coming to America.
In fact, our country's population
is almost entirely comprised of
descendants of immigrants;
however,
there are a few things that those
who have recently come to our
country, and apparently some native
Americans, need to understand.
First of all,
it is not our responsibility
to continually try not to offend you
in any way. This idea of America being
a multi-cultural community has served
only to dilute our sovereignty and
our national identity.
As Americans,
we have our own culture,
our own society, our own language,
and our own lifestyle.
This culture, called
the "American Way"
has been developed over centuries
of struggles, trials, and victories
by millions of men and women
who have sought freedom.
Our forefathers fought, bled,
and died at places such as Bunker Hill,
Antietam, San Juan, Iwo Jima,
Normandy, Korea, Vietnam,
We speak English, not Spanish,
Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian,
or any other language. Therefore, if
you wish to become part of our
society - learn our language!
"In God We Trust"
is our national motto.
This is not some off-the-wall,
Christian, Right Wing, political slogan;
it is our national motto.
It is engraved in stone in the House
of Representatives in our Capitol
and it is printed on our currency.
We adopted this motto because
Christian men and women, on
Christian principles, founded this
nation; and this is clearly documented
throughout our history.
If it is appropriate for our motto
to be inscribed in the halls of our
highest level of Government,
then it is certainly appropriate
to display it on the walls of our schools.
God is in our pledge,
our National Anthem, nearly every
patriotic song, and in our founding
documents. We honor His birth, death,
and resurrection as holidays, and we
turn to Him in prayer in times of crisis.
If God offends you, then I suggest
you consider another part of the world
as your new home, because God is part
of our culture and we are proud
to have Him.
We are proud of our heritage and those
who have so honorably defended
our freedoms. We celebrate
Independence Day, Memorial Day,
Veterans Day, and Flag Day.
We have parades, picnics, and barbecues
where we proudly wave our flag.
As an American, I have the right
to wave my flag, sing my national
anthem, quote my national motto,
and cite my pledge whenever and
wherever I choose.
If the Stars and Stripes offend you,
or you don't like Uncle Sam,
then you should seriously consider
a move to another part of this planet.
The American culture is our way of life,
our heritage, and we are proud of it.
We are happy with our culture and
have no desire to change, and we
really don't care how you did
things where you came from,
if it was so superior, go home.
We are Americans, like it or not,
this is our country, our land,
and our lifestyle.
Our First Amendment gives every
citizen the right to express his
opinion about our government, culture,
or society, and we will allow you
every opportunity to do so.
But once you are done complaining,
whining, and griping about our flag,
our pledge, our national motto,
or our way of life,
I highly encourage you take advantage
of one other great American freedom,
the right to leave.
MAY GOD BLESS AMERICA
LAND THAT WE LOVE!!!
October 19, 2001 - 8:52am October 19, 2001
While the chance of finding any survivors in the World Trade Center rubble vanished long ago, there is a survivor story.
A cat apparently trapped under the debris has been found alive, with a new litter of three kittens.
Mom with one of her babies. Rescuers found the cats curled up in a carton of napkins. They were in the basement of what used to be a restaurant at the World Trade Center.
Rescue workers rushed mom and the kittens to a vet.
Mom was thin and dehydrated, however, vets say all of the cats will be just fine.
Anyone who has paid attention to the situation of women in Afghanistan should not have been surprised to learn that the Taliban are complicit in terrorism. When radical Muslim movements are on the rise, women are the canaries in the mines. The very visible repression of forced veiling and loss of hard-won freedoms coexists naturally with a general disrespect for human rights. This repression of women is not about religion; it is a political tool for achieving and consolidating power.
Sher Abbas Stanakzai, then the Taliban regime's deputy foreign minister, admitted as much in a 1997 interview. "Our current restrictions of women are necessary in order to bring the Afghan people under control," he said. "We need these restrictions until people learn to obey the Taliban."
In the same way that many Islamic extremist crusades use the oppression of women to help them gain control over wider populations, the Taliban and Osama bin Laden are now employing the tactics of terrorism to gain control.
The Taliban did not start the oppression of Afghan women, nor have they been its only practitioners.
In 1989, Arab militants working with the Afghan resistance to the Soviet Union based in Peshawar, Pakistan - and helping to finance the resistance fighters - issued a fatwa, or religious ruling, stating that Afghan women would be killed if they worked for humanitarian organizations. At that time, a third of the Afghan population of 15 million were displaced from their homes, and many were heavily dependent on humanitarian groups for food and other necessities. Among the 3.5 million of these refugees who were then living in Pakistan, many were war widows supporting their families by working for the aid groups. After the fatwa, Afghan women going to work were shot at and several were murdered. Some international aid groups promptly stopped employing Afghan women, and though many women were infuriated, most complied after being intimidated by the violent attacks. Soon afterward, another edict in Peshawar forbade Afghan women to "walk with pride" or walk in the middle of the street and said they must wear the hijab, the Arab black head and body covering and half-face veil. Again, most women felt they had no choice but to comply.
In 1990, a fatwa from Afghan leaders in Peshawar decreed that women should not attend schools or become educated, and that if they did, the Islamic movement would meet with failure. The document measured 2 feet by 3 feet to accommodate the signatures of about 200 mullahs and political leaders representing the majority of the seven main mujahedeen parties of Afghanistan. The leading school for Afghan girls in Peshawar, where many Afghan refugees still lived, was sprayed with Kalashnikov gunfire. It closed for months, and its principal was forced into hiding.
When an alliance of mujahedeen groups took over in Kabul in 1992, it forced women out of news broadcasting and government ministry jobs and required them to wear veils. But it was the Taliban who institutionalized the total oppression of women after Kabul fell to them four years later, and who required the total coverage of the now familiar burqa.
Now, as Afghans, Pakistanis and Americans look to the future of Afghanistan, most plans call for a broad-based new government giving representation to all of Afghanistan's ethnic groups and major political parties, including the Taliban. No one, however, has called for the participation of women, even though women, after many years of war, now almost certainly make up the majority of the adult Afghan population.
Afghan women gradually gained rights in the first decades of the 20th century. Women helped write their country's Constitution in 1964. They served in parliament and the cabinet and were diplomats, academics, professionals, judges and even army generals. All of this happened well before the Soviets arrived in 1979, with their much-touted claim of liberating Afghan women.
Many of the forces now opposing the Taliban include signatories of the later fatwas that deprived Afghan women of their rights. History is repeating itself.
Any political process that moves forward without the representation and participation of women will undermine any chances that the principles of democracy and human rights will take hold in Afghanistan. It will be the first clue that little has changed.
Jan Goodwin is author of "Price of Honor," a book on women and Islamic extremism. Jessica Neuwirth is president of Equality Now, an international women's rights group.
http://www.nytimes.com/2001/10/19/opinion/19GOOD.html?ex=1004587869&ei=1&en=da033875ac6474b4
Copyright 2001 The New York Times Company
Osama has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It gets so bad that his camel dies of thirst.
He's crawling through the sands, certain that he has breathed his last, when all of a sudden he sees a shiny object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers that he has a Manischevitz wine bottle.
It appears that there may be a drop or two left in the bottle, so he unscrews the top and out pops a genie.
But this is no ordinary genie. This genie appears to be a Hassidic rabbi, complete with black alpaca coat, black hat, side curls, etc.
"Well, kid," says the genie. "You know how it works. You have three wishes."
"I'm not going to trust you," says Osama. "I'm not going to trust a Jewish genie!"
"What do you have to lose? It looks like you're a goner anyway!"
Osama thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right.
"OK, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plentiful food and drink."
***POOF***
Osama finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen. And he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.
"OK, kid, what's your second wish."
"My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams."
***POOF***
Osama finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.
"OK, kid, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!"
After thinking for a few minutes, Osama says: "I wish I were white and surrounded by beautiful women."
***POOF***
Osama is turned into a Tampax.
The moral of the story is: Be careful of what you wish for. There may be strings attached.
Put together a model of the World Trade Center in all its glory. If you would like to download and build this memorial paper model of the World Trade Center, please consider a $1.00 contribution to the New York State World Trade Center Relief Fund.
http://www.fiddlersgreen.net/WTC/model.htm
